Your Free Will can Destroy God's Will For You

Stubborn and Blind

We spend so much time and energy on what we think we want and how we think those wants should be delivered to us. The Matrix world has us fixated on the outward appearances. We have our own preconceived notions of what we deem perfection. We think every answered prayer must come wrapped in a pretty package with a lovely bow. (Best place to hide a treasure chest is in an old condemned outhouse… no one would want to look there.) (The best written books sometimes have the most worn cover.) Many times God gives us what we asked for and we miss it. Because we are so wrapped up in what we think it should look like/be.

How many times has GOD answered a prayer and we, in our own stubborness or lack of belief, have passed the answer by? Have you ever asked yourself this? How many times have I entertained Angels unaware?

Hebrews 13:2

Be not forgetful to entertain strangers: for thereby some have entertained angels unawares.

How many times has GOD directly tried to touch us? But, we in our own stubborness and ego think we are somehow in total control over everything and everyone in our life…. Short of GOD bonking us on the head to awaken our stubborn asses… We have free will. When we do not take the gift/answer and we snub it we must pay the consequences. Why does it take us so long to learn lessons? WE hold our own self back. When we finally realize that we were never in total control… That GOD is in control… we can let go and let GOD do HIS perfect work in us.

James 1: 2-8

² Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, ³ because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. ⁴ Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. ⁵ If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. ⁶ But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. ⁷ That person should not expect to receive anything from the Lord. ⁸ Such a person is double-minded and unstable in all they do.

This goes with everything… work/career, love… We like to think we can order things and people about and put our own expectations on everything. We can be so critical and greedy. We may not want to fall in love… We may not want someone to come in and appear better than us at something… because we already think we are less than. When, in fact the lesson may have been in maturity and seeing ourselves as we truly are… taking stock in self and being honest. WE may think we deserve that pay raise and when we don’t get it become angry. When it could have been GOD saying this job is not for you… We may get angry at falling in love with someone who we deem not good enough and try to direct them to change their looks, disabilities and social status to fit what we believe we must have… Or we may think we are out of their league. When, all along, we had the ability to allow LOVE to heal both parties. We do not understand our own connectivity to one another and the universe. We each have the ability to heal ourselves… but the true power is in unity… in numbers.

We try to direct GOD’s will for us… HIS perfect timing for everything under the sun. (Ecclesiastes 3: 1-8) (By the way, the number one song on the day I was born was “Turn! Turn! Turn!” (To Everything There Is a Season) by The Byrds…. My life has been a gigantic test of will and patience in every season. Look up your number one song and read the lyrics… see how it might apply to your journey… just for fun…)

We fight ourselves… because we want things our way and in our time. Oh how we miss the true value of learning patience. Patience is IN the waiting. It is in how we wait and how we receive the gifts GOD gives to us. Spoiled and ungrateful. If it doesn’t come to us the way we imagined it in our minds then it isn’t good enough. When we fight GOD’s will we lose our way. We struggle within. We have a difficult time finding our creativity in the things that normally flow for us. If we only would learn to float with the waves instead of fighting against them. If we were only good children in tune with our Father…

Proverbs 19:21

Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the LORD’s purpose that prevails.

And heaven forbid, if we cannot have our way with healing or who our heart wants. Then we fight it with every ounce of vitriol within us. Because there is no way it can happen any other way… It has to be X,Y,Z and at such and such a time and not moment sooner. IT DOESN’T WORK that way. GOD gives us what we need in any given moment. It is us who fudge it all up. Oh how GOD must get so frustrated with us. We simply do not allow ourseleves to meditate, pray, reflect, and find the answers. We would rather try to throw the engineer off the train and pilot it ourself. Obviously we know better… HA HA HA!!! How is that working for us now?

We have all been through a lot these past 7 and a half years. I have been through a great deal my entire life. Trying to keep my head above the abyss that the enemy designed to bury me in. My stubborness has been both a survival mechanism and an educational hindrance. Stubborness gave me the will to climb out of the abyss. To fight for life and self worth… LOVE… It has, at times, held me back from seeking GOD’s love, answers and plans for my life. Now I am a women with a broken body, a strong love for GOD and a fierce desire to help as many as I can get past the finish line. God has me on a mission and all my focus is on HIM and the things HE has asked of me. While I do my best to fulfill the wishes of my Father, I am still learning and healing within. I am giving all I can…

I am surrendering myself to GOD for the good of everyone and everything. The healing of my body may never come. The healing of my heart and mind are the focus at this moment. I am one person. I was destroyed physically, mentally and emotionally by many people…. it may take more than I to put the physical me back together. I have faith in GOD and what he can and is doing within me. It might not be fast enough or the way some want it to happen… but that is up to GOD… I am doing my utmost best here…. I wish that the ones I love could see the intrinsic nature and the difficult work I have been doing with self, GOD and humanity…. and appreciate the huge effort…. and love me, for me…. Those who struggle with seeing me in pain and doing what I am doing… Maybe your lesson here is to learn to love beyond appearances and truly see the love/Spirit within yourself and others. I have a great deal of tenacity and strength, thank GOD… I ask you, could you do all that I am after all that I have lived through? If it were not for GOD, I couldn’t have come this far. I shall fight on for healing, for humanity and for GOD… His heart is my heart. His love is my love…

Lets learn to love each other for what they truly are within… The package a treasure comes in is just the package… and in no way any indication of the value. LOVE is beautiful in all its forms. We need to see this and accept this. We need to learn to love ourself and others beyond the package, beyond the noise of the matrix and beyond the meat suit’s teachings. We can do this together. We do not have to do it alone. GOD is with us.

Much love to you all… God bless.